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According to the Energy Department, high gas prices may be around for the next six months. After that they’ll be followed by really high gas prices. SUV stands for Suddenly Useless Vehicle. (Jay Leno) Funny animation Top 10 reasons gas went up 10. Hussein threatened to invade Houston if we didn't raise prices. 9. We're doing our part to reduce global warming. 8. Demand is increasing, or decreasing, something like that. 7. We were hoping you wouldn't notice. 6. The consultant we hired to do this list is gouging us. 5. We're going to raise enough money to bail out the S&L's. 4. It's not a price increase, it's a user fee. 3. We want to see if gas pumps can count that fast. 2. There was a big oil spill in Alaska... no, that was last time. 1. There was a sudden surge in demand for fuel to fly Dan Rather all over the Middle East. -Greg Scott Think a gallon of gas is expensive? Diet Snapple 16 oz $1.29 . ......$10.32 per gallon Lipton Ice Tea 16 oz $1.19 ........$9.52 per gallon Gatorade 20 oz $1.59 ........$10.17 per gallon Ocean Spray 16 oz $1.25 ........$10.00 per gallon Brake Fluid 12 oz $3.15 .........$33.60 per gallon Vick's Nyquil 6 oz $8.35 ..........$178.13 per gallon Whiteout 7 oz $1.39 ......... $25.42 per gallon Scope 1.5 oz $0.99 .......$84.48 per gallon
And this is the REAL KICKER... (Evian spelled backwards is Naive. So, the next time you're at the pump, be glad your car doesn't run on water, Scope, or Whiteout, or God forbid, Pepto Bismol or Nyquil. -Latino Pundit License plates: * 1WTHGOD (One With God) * 22 NICE (Too Too Nice) * 2COY 4U (Too Coy For You) * ALICE (On a white Rabbit, as in "Alice in Wonderland") * AQTU12 (A Cutie, You One Too?) * CTDRV55 (Can't Drive 55) * GO TPLS (Go Topless, found on a convertible) * ICULAFN (I See You Laughing) * IMD14U (I'm the One For You) * LUKE4 8 (Luke 4:8: "And Jesus answered and said unto him, 'Get thee behind me, Satan'") * MMMBABY (Mmm...Baby) * NVRLKBK (Never Look Back) * RECHDXS (Wretched Excess) * SAY AHH (On a doctor's car) * UNV ME (You Envy Me) * XXRENUF (Two Ex's Are Enough) * BRRR (Car from Vermont) * ZIPNBY (Zipping By) When I die, I want to go like my grandfather--who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all his passengers." "The problem with the designated driver program, it's not a desirable job, but if you ever get sucked into doing it, have fun with it. At the end of the night, drop them off at the wrong house." --Jeff Foxworthy |
 
 
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